A few good reads 10.16.16

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BMI is Bullshit – Here’s Why It’s Time For Doctors to Ditch It via Everyday Feminism

Mom’s Honest Before-And-After Photos Come With Inspiring Message via Huffington Post

No More Diets…and Other AAP Recommendations via Psychology Today

For Fashion Designer Christian Siriano, No Size is Out of Style via NPR

Why We Need to Talk About High-Functioning Depression via Huffington Post

 

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A few good reads 10.9.16

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How Kate Winslet’s New Movie Puts Body Confidence in the Spotlight via Bustle

10 Bigoted Ideas Posing as ‘Tackling Obesity’ with the Foodscape Argument via Everyday Feminism

What I Mean When I Say ‘I Have Anxiety’ via Huffington Post

Gaslighting: The Mind Game Everyone Should Know About via Elephant Journal

Jessamyn Stanley is Changing the Yoga World, One Pose at a Time via Self

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A few good reads 10.2.16

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Body Shamer in Chief: Why Donald Trump Hates Fat People So Much by Sunny Sea Gold

Inside the Fight to take Back the Fitting Room via Time

How I Learned to Stop Comparing Myself to Others, And Love My Own Ideas by Meredith Fineman

Recovered Enough: A Fairy Tale by Kaila Prins

Why Dieting Can Rarely (If Ever) Be Body Positive via Bustle

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A few good reads 9.24.16

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The Evolution of ‘Eating Whatever I Want’ in a Post-Diet World by Isabel Foxen Duke

Fat Shaming is Not an Individual Problem, It’s a Cultural One by Lesley Kinzel via Medium

How the bathroom scale fueled American fat shaming by Stephanie Buck via Timeline

‘We Wear What We Want’ Is the Body Positive Movement We All Need via Ravishly

The Problem with Thin Privilege by Kelsey Miller via Refinery 29

 

 

 

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Work in progress

I recently read an article from Joni Edelman over at Ravishly that reminded me of two things. One: cake that is layered with buttercream really is the best. And two: recovery is not linear. Whether it’s from an eating disorder, or the diet mentality, or the emotional abuse you put yourself through trying to live up to some ridiculous standard of beauty in a world that has no idea what it actually wants. It’s never a direct process.

It is uncomfortable and scary and sometimes makes you wonder if it’s worth it. I’ve thought about this a lot, especially in the last year when I’ve really forced myself to ask the tough questions. Because sometimes it doesn’t feel worth it. Sometimes it seems like it would be a lot easier to go back to the disordered thoughts and behaviors. For the longest time, that was the default. And it was constantly reinforced by the world around me – advertisements, media, conversations held and conversations simply overheard – the general consensus is that thinner is better. Less is more. Restriction is a virtue. Food is good or bad, and as a result so are you.

Sometimes recovery sucks.

It’s not as if those thoughts simply disappear, or that the conversations are no longer heard, or that the images cease to exist.

We fight through them. We work around them. We are are own source of positive reinforcement, and it can be exhausting.

For a long time, I was tired. I was so tired of thinking about it, fighting for it, believing in it. And so I had to take a step back. Not from recovery itself, but from immersing myself in it. I had to back away and not think so much about what I thought it “should” look like. I had to give myself the space to screw it up, to struggle with it, to hate it. I had to toss my hands up and say “I give up.” Not to recovery, but to the expectation around it.

It’s still hard, even though I don’t miss the way I used to feel. I still grieve it, not because I liked the behaviors and the beliefs but because for so long they made up my worth. Trying to separate myself from that often felt like a loss. I realize that there was more to gain because of it – including weight – and that’s not easy to process either.

Some days I feel like I’m starting over, but I quickly remind myself how far I’ve come. Far enough, finally, that I don’t want to go back. There are finally, amazingly, more days that I’m at peace with myself than not. But it’s a work in progress. It always will be. I’m finally learning to be okay with that, and with me.

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A few good reads 6.26.16

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Why the “health” argument for dieting is kind of a moot point by Isabel Foxen Duke

I Un-Quit Sugar by Caroline Dooner

Here’s How Fatphobia is Being Marketed to You – And Why So Many of Us Buy Into It by Kaila Prins via Everyday Feminism

Forget Emotional Eating, Let’s Talk About Emotional Dieting by Summer Innanen

You’re Not Broken: The Hidden Dangers of Personal Development by Jason Connell

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A few good reads 6.5.16

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No, it’s not you: why ‘wellness’ isn’t the answer to overwork via The Conversation

The Elephant in the Room: How Our Weight Bias Harms Us via Huffington Post

What it Means to “Take Care of Yourself…” via Summer Innanen

On Balance via Caroline Dooner

So I’ve Gained Weight. SO WHAT? by Jes Baker via Ravishly

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